A Note from Diet Island

Some of you may know that this month I've moved my consciousness to Diet Island in order to try to lose weight. What? You've never heard of diet island? Well, let me tell you about it! It's the place you send your thoughts whenever you eat anything. On diet island, there's only thoughts of luscious raw veggies, visions of yourself looking svelte in a swimming suit , and near romantic thoughts of your treadmill. One thing that all of us on diet island do is eat things that might not be our first choice. In example, today for lunch I had a vegan tofu "chickn" patty on whole wheat bread. It smelled divine while I baked it. The chihuahuas were intoxicated and begged mercilessly for a taste. (If any of you have ever encountered a tiny begging chihuahua you know that they simply can't be denied!) I threw them both a yummy taste and to my surprise, they both spit, it, out! I mean, the animals who have been known to eat unidentifiable molding items in the alley turned my lunch down flat. Then, to add insult to injury, Chimi took his bit and successfully smeared it down his back as he rolled in it! HA! I think that tonight for dinner I might take a trip to the mainland to eat something that a dog wouldn't roll in.